B*A*K*E*R*S D*O*Z*E*N
Best of January, 2011 week one
(1) I’m getting older…and people have started saying
to me: Don’t worry…you were always like that!…
(2) They won’t let my brother-in-law Ray play
Scrabble…he claims there is too an “i” in “teaim”…
(3) Nothing really changes, does it?…the first proposal for
eliminating the Electoral College came way back in 1797…
(4) So you call a meeting for 9:30am…you show up at 11am…
and you’re the first one there…just another day at the office…
(5) Cool Daddy’s wife finally learned how to drive…how long did it take?…3 cars…
(6) …she said to him: See, you spent 45 minutes on the phone,
just like me…he said: Hon, the difference is I talked to 22 people…
(7) Henny Youngman made a killing on the stock market…he shot his broker…
(8) Margaret Thatcher: Socialism works until you run out of other people’s money.
(8) Old saying: Creditors have better memories than debtors…except
when they forget who they should have never lent to in the first place…
(9) Grew up in a tough neighborhood…funeral home had a shoplifting problem…
(10) The best way to handle a bore is to mercilessly agree with him…
(11) The Most Interesting Man in the World…when people
have an out-of-body experience…they go visit him!…
(12) Someone once said the best thing about thinking logically is
that when you make a mistake, you do it with complete confidence…
(13) Upon receiving an award, Jack Benny remarked: You know, I
don’t deserve this…but then I have arthritis, and I don’t deserve that either.
POUTINE-ON-A-STICK
To be classified as a “classic,” all a car needs is to be 25 years old…so 2012 welcomes the class of 1987, lead by the “Caddy Corvette,” the Allanté. Everything made in the USA except the body…that was by Pininfarina of Italy. 21,000 made over 7 years, including a little more than 3300 that first model year. I never liked the “dip” along the top of the door-line (below, top)…so I would have straightened it out (below, bottom).
