Stolf’s Blog 2/10/2011

Ft. Wayne, Indiana is looking for a name for their new public office building. On-line voting favors a man who was mayor from 1934-47, and 1951-54, when he died in office. He has more than triple the number of votes as the 2nd place contender. A no-brainer, right? Welcome to the Hairy Balls Government Center. OK, his name was Harry Baals, and this descendants pronounce it Bales, altho he pronounced it Balls. Says Deputy Mayor Beth Malloy, “He had an unfortunate name and we’re not going to make any decision that looks bad.” So they’re probably going to go with the runner-up. Something about Ft. Wayners being OK with it…obviously…but the “outside” world wouldn’t be. Shades of “Imported from Detroit.” Sounds like the current administration should get some baals. Just say Bales. Or Balls…his name’s his name…they were apparently able to cope with it from 1937 to 1954, right?

BTW…I wondered where the Mayor was in this story, since the Deputy Mayor is one they quoted. Cool Daddy told me he was unavailable for comment, the Honorable Hugh G. Rection.

B*A*K*E*R*S   D*O*Z*E*N

(1) You’ve heard of Beethoven’s Unfinished Symphony…
did you know he was writing it in his unfinished basement?

(2) Ralph Waldo Emerson: A weed is a plant whose virtues have yet to be discovered.

(3) …but they say, to tell the weeds from the plants…
pull them all…the ones that come back are the weeds.

(4) After a meal, lick your plate. Sure, your family will look askance…
but your cat or dog won’t…in fact, they’ll think: “What too you so long?”

(5) » » » » Old favorite: Once bitten, twice shy. « « « «

(6) Woody Allen wrote about a career criminal who spent his last years
in mail fraud…but the postal rates went up and he lost everything…

(7) …some things are just so stupid, you have to laugh…
and to me, that (6) was one of them…thank you, Woody Allen.

(8) The secret to life is to find all the Why’s that will trump all the How’s.

(9) Cool Daddy’s happy…he didn’t pay his water bill, so they shut off his drips.

(10) Q: How did Gomer Pyle become disoriented?…A: Sgt. Carter said: Face front!

(11) Samuel Johnson said: In lapidary inscriptions, a man is not upon oath.
(Modern translation: I don’t care what I said inside your locket…)

(12) Cool Daddy’s kid said he was working on a science experiment…
he strapped a piece of buttered toast to a cat’s back, then dropped it…

(13) She eats Swiss Cheese inside-out…well, she likes to make the holes bigger.



I think this type of corn exists only in seed catalogs…BTW, try matching up the colors in the picture with the colors they are offering for sale…not easy, is it?

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