Reasons why a dog might…I’m saying might…want to be a human being:
You don’t have a tail to chase…you don’t have to continually
check to see if that’s you back there, and not somebody else.
You can carry something and talk at the same time…imagine the possibilities!
You don’t have to bite anybody if you don’t feel like it…or have a tooth-ache.
You can walk thru walls (think about it…)
You know where the infinite food comes from.
It’s easier to fall down…in fact, twice as easy.
You can clean a spot off your coat without tasting it.
Cars come with a built-in howling device.
A tree doesn’t have to smell like somebody you know, whose name
escapes you at the moment..and a rock doesn’t smell like anybody.
You can pick your nose…not just your friends…
(1) Saw a commercial for a burger with applewood-smoked bacon…then one
with cherrywood-smoked bacon…go all the way…mahogany-smoked bacon…
(2) …or…dare I even think it…teak? Got a light?
(3) Who was Nanker Phelge? That was the name of a song’s composer if all
5 Rolling Stones were to share the royalties…plus Ian Stewart on keyboards.
(4) Glenda Jackson said: With acting, you have to be
able to laugh and cry…either way, I think of my sex life.
(5) > > > Good luck…local pig farm declares No-Fly Zone… < < <
(6) Bumper snicker: If you can read this,
we’re about to exchange insurance information.
(7) Cool Daddy’s shrink says he’s an especially tough case…
this multiple personalities are…triplets!
(8) Robert Louis Stevenson: Keep your fear to yourself, share your courage with others.
(9) » » » When in doubt, you might actually be better off… « « «
(10) Poet John Donne wrote: Busy old fool, unruly Sun,
why dost thou through windows and through curtains call on us?
(11) Life is good…you’ve got a pharmacist who
doesn’t mind when you called her a “pill-slinger.”
(12) It was a dark and stormy night…just the way I like it, as a matter of fact.
(13) Thomas Jefferson: When angry, count ten before you speak…or an hundred [sic].