Stolf’s Blog 6/9/2011

Did I ever tell you about the time I met this girl at a bar…she was very depressed. I told her that sometimes it’s good to talk your troubles over with a total stranger. She said OK…turns out she’s seeing a shrink 3 times a week, but she isn’t making any progress. Her problem is she’s a nymphomaniac, with a thing for Jewish cowboys. I said: Now don’t you feel better, getting that off your chest? By the way, I’m Tex Goldberg…

B*A*K*E*R*S  D*O*Z*E*N

(1) My goal is to be a Living Legend…posthumously, if I have to.

(2) Bertrand Russell: The trouble with the world is the
stupid are cocksure, and the intelligent are full of doubt.

(3) Steven Wright has a decaffeinated coffee table…
at least it doesn’t keep him up at night…

(4) At the factory, they accidentally installed a kaleidoscope instead
of a periscrope…every time the sub went out, they were surrounded

(5) A true politician denies stuff he didn’t say, just to be on the safe side…

(6) Cop told her the speed limit was 50 miles an hour…
She said: I know, but I’ve only been out 20 minutes…

(7) Love: The Quest…Marriage: The Conquest…Divorce: The Inquest…

(8) Dean Rusk: One of the best ways to persuade others is with your ears.

(9) New restaurant opened called “Deju Vu”… all the waiters look familiar…

(10) Cool Daddy is every inch a gentleman…well, every other inch.

(11) She read Slaughterhouse 5…liked it better than the first 4…

(12) DNA exsits everywhere in the universe,
in every galaxy…OK, they spell it different…

(13) Robert Morley: What have I done to achieve longevity?
I tried to remember not to wear my hearing aid in the bath…

POUTINE-ON-A-STICK

Customized cars back in the day really did have those tall fins, like Greased Lightning…

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