Stolf’s Blog 9/21/2011

B*A*K*E*R*S   D*O*Z*E*N

(1) Great “Mom’s Saying”…I’m deaf in one ear and I can’t hear out of the other…

(2) Charles Woodson is the only Heisman Trophy winner to
intercept a fellow Heisman winner in the NFL…Matt Leinart,
Vinny Testaverde, Carson Palmer…and now Cam Newton…

(3) If you work in a supermarket, is there a sign in back that says:
IF WE STOP CARRYING IT, TELL THE
CUSTOMERS THEY STOPPED MAKING IT

(4)  2 kinds of adhesive tape: the kind that won’t stick, and the kind that won’t come off.

(5) My parents taught me religion…as in: You better pray that comes out of the carpet!

(6) Groucho said: A hospital bed is like a parked taxi with the meter running…

(7) ….and also: A child of 5 could understand this…somebody bring me a child of 5…

(8) A cat is always wary of a “strange person”…
that’s someone who hasn’t given it anything to eat yet.

(9) Bill James, snake oil salesman of baseball’s stat set (I’m one) has a new stat…
a player’s “baseball temperature”…clever from a marketing standpoint I suppose…
but ultimately just a meaningless formula…all I know is, Ted Williams’s was 98.6…

(10) You always told yourself that if you ever got invited to dinner
at the White House, you’d be sure to steal an ashtray…d’oh!!…

(11)   George Orwell opined: Serious sports is war without shooting.

(12) Kid down the street says his new girlfriend wants to take it to a
new level…unfortunately, it’s a lower level…doncha just hate that?…

(13) Mark Twain: Always do what’s right…
this will gratify some people & astonish the rest.

POUTINE-ON-A-STICK

Been a long time since I looked forward to the funny pages, but what can I say? These guys got it working for me…left page, from he top, Mutts, Pickles, Classic Peanuts, Garfield, and Blondie…all seem to be hitting their stride these says. Pickles especially is a gem…love this “physical” type gag with the monkey in the tree…Peanuts would have ones like that…see below…plus more for the monkey…but speaking of which, check this Boz Scaggs clip…actually, there are 3 tunes here, I’m taking about the first one…Back in ’64 I was feeling ’63…

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