stolf’s blog 7/16/12…and I mean it…

Everywhere the consumer turns these days, he is scammed, cheated, and lied to. We take it for granted, and pretty much ignore it…what else can you do, let it drive you nuts? Still, I felt particularly ripped off the other day when I bought a container of One-A-Day Men’s 50+ vitamins. Mind you, I bought what I did based on the size of the package…it was, as I discovered later, a 50-count, bumped up to 65…whoop-dee-do. But here’s what I found when I opened it…

It appeared to be half-empty…so I measured it…3 inches top to bottom (red line)…pills reached just to the 1 1/4 inch mark (blue line)…and that was with the ruler displacing some of the pills to the side, so the pill level was actually a little lower. By my math, that’s more than half-empty (half would be the orange line.) Did I get the full 65 pills? Probably…I didn’t have the heart to count them.

Is it possible they simply didn’t have an in-between size container that would hold 65 pills, so they used the next largest they had? Yes, it’s possible. Still, when you find a container of anything less than half-full…and with pills, it’s not due to “contents settling”!…you feel you’ve been had. There…I’ve had my say…

B*A*K*E*R*S  D*O*Z*E*N

(1)  “House slippers”…are there any other kind?…well, “slipper”
originally meant any shoe you could slip into…without laces, buttons,
or buckles…like Cinderella’s “glass slippers” or Dorothy’s “ruby slippers.”

(2)  Mark Twain: Why do you sit there looking
like an envelope without an address on it?…

(3)  As classic car buffs know, there were dozens of manufacturers
of autos in the 1920s…still, over half the cars on the road at the time
were Ford Model T’s…in 1923 alone they sold over 2 million…

(4)  …by way of contrast, the second best-selling car model for
one year was the 1965 Chevrolet Impala, at just over 1 million…

(5)  Most problems can be solved by applying a brick to the correct skull…
the devil’s in the details…which skull?…and where’s my brick?…

(6)  So how did ZOMBIES get from the robotic assassins of
our youth (left, from I Walked With a Zombie, 1943) to the flesh-
eating hoards of today?…it traces back to Richard Matheson’s
1954 novel “I Am Legend”…altho he called them “vampires”…

(7)  MOPAR goes back to 1937…it stands for “Motor Parts”…just that simple…

(8)  My sweet-tooth has abated over the years…but I never thought something
flavored with honey would seem too sweet to me…but it does…and I like honey…

(9)  When does misinformation turn into a lie?…the headline:
Outrage After Town Bans Grilling… the truth: they merely reminded
folks of a long-standing ordinance that grills must be 5 feet from a
structure, which most people do anyway…and they acknowledged it
was unenforceable…they just didn’t want you to burn your house down…

(10) You’ve probably lived your entire life without knowing this…but
your time has run out: the orchid plant gets its name from orchis,
the Greek word for testicle…owing of course to the shape of its roots…

(11) The easy way to save $1000…find something that costs $1000, and don’t buy it.

(12)  Bumper sticker read: What year did Jesus think is was?…ha ha…
well, by the Jewish calendar, this is the year 5772…you do the math…

(13)  Woodrow Wilson, upon graduating from President of Princeton to
President of the United States: After dealing with the college politician,
the men with whom I am now dealing seem like amateurs…

POUTINE-ON-A-STICK

Ever seen a Black Lion? You still haven’t…these have been Photoshopped, from images of a white one…still pretty cool, sez me…

POUTINE-ON-A-STICK EXTRA

Laff, darn ya!!

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