stolf’s blog 7/23/12

Did you see this in your Sunday paper? On the surface of it, it seems pretty honest and straightforward…not rigged or gimmicked as far as I can see…just a promotional sweepstakes (but see item (7) below.) Altho it turns out 120 years constitutes “forever”…OK, so the Mayans were off a little. Of course with my luck, even if I did win, the Prize Patrol that showed up at my house wouldn’t include that lady on the right…instead, her dumpy, gray-haired maiden aunt.

Still, for the fun of it, let’s do the math. Now it’s interesting that in these days where everything is nontransferable, in this case you can “pass it on” to someone else…what they mysteriously call one other natural person. Perhaps this means to exclude a corporation or other non-individual entity. And they limit it to 120 years…yes, years! Still, you wonder how much 5 Grand will be worth in 2132 AD…and will Publishers Clearing House, or even its successor, still exist…heck, will publishing still exist…or even money for that matter?

But they do seem to acknowledge the inevitable rate of inflation…the alternate “lump sum” prize is One Million Dollars…whereas the payout for 120 years times 52 weeks at $5000 per week would be over 31 Million. Could it last that long? The Complete Official Rules online don’t say how old the initial winner has to be…let’s say 18. They must designate a secondary winner within 30 days and cannot change it thereafter…altho it  can be a minor. Now you could do a lot of fancy calculating, but look at it this way: the payouts end when the secondary winner dies. And if on August 31, 2012 that secondary winner is a newborn, it could conceivably live 120 years, especially since there could be any number of life-prolonging discoveries coming down the pike.

Still, there are 2 things down at the bottom of this ad that concern me. The first is that while entries must be received by August 15, 2012…the “end date” for this giveaway is February 29, 2015. Geez, the judges must really check those entries, boy, if it takes that long! I tried reading the Complete Official Rules online, but could find no explanation. Feel free to try yourself.

And second, the estimated odds of winning are quoted as being a little over 1 in 1.2 Billion. So unless this promotion is running overseas, they’re figuring everyone in the US will enter about 4 times…seems a little optimistic, to the point where you wonder whether there’s isn’t “something else” going on here…but anyway, good luck and God bless…I for one won’t be competing against you…

B*A*K*E*R*S  D*O*Z*E*N

(1)  Repeal the Law of Gravity…or at least reduce the penalties!…

(2)  Always loved the way William F. Buckley wrote…in 1979, when Teddy
was challenging Carter for the 1980 nomination: The partisans of Senator
Kennedy cannot safely be assumed, all of them, to be moral cretins.

(3)  …or when a disgruntled reader of the National Review asked that his
subscription be cancelled, Buckley replied, in print no less: Cancel your
own goddam subscription!…perhaps my favorite bon mot of all time…

(4)  …speaking of which, this was part of a missive from the Wall
Street Journal
: We’re certain that as a long-time subscriber you
wouldn’t want your subscription to lapse
…which is to say, some of
the folks in circulation are just as clueless as some of the reporters…;) 😉

(5)  Back in the day, Cool Daddy’s mother threw
all his baseball cards out…then she threw him out…

(6)  Barack Obama?…first there was Osama bin Laden…
now abuse of a prescription narcotic called Opana
is somebody trying to tell us something?…

(7)  Originally a sweepstakes was a race, like a horse-race…
the winner took all the entry fees of the other participants…

(8)  Head for the hills!…here come the OOOOOlympics…

(9)  When I was a kid, my favorite lollipop flavor was root beer…
and thinking of soft drinks, I wondered if they had ginger-ale
flavored…and today…I still wonder…Dr. Pepper?…Moxie?…

(10)  They say there’s a shortage of geriatric doctors…but that must
be a tough job…when all your patients know more than you do!…

(11)  Great name for an old-time cowboy hero sidekick: Replaceable Jones.

(12)  Sure, I get tons of junk email…but why one for trans-vaginal mesh?

(13)  There are currently 2 kinds of electric bicycles available…
motor-assist…can propel the bike without you pedaling…
pedal-assist…engages only when you pedal, to “help”…


Available from the 1920s thru the 1960s, it had nothing to do with chicken, being a chocolate-covered nut-roll…the name came from “a chicken in every pot.” But then “Corn King” bacon and ham used to confuse me too…corn-fed hogs, I reckon?


I never go to bars…tho they do sound like fun places…NORM!!!

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